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How To Become A “Sanskari” Girl?

Earning the esteemed title of “Sanskari” from our typical Indian uncles & aunties is not as easy as it actually sounds! In fact

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Earning the esteemed title of “Sanskari” from our typical Indian uncles & aunties is not as easy as it actually sounds! In fact, if you are an evil, liberated, and independent Indian woman, chances are pretty high that you belong to the most “un-sanskari” category of all. But hey! You don’t have to feel dejected any more as today you will find some really easy ways to kill all your dreams and passions and become that perfect-sanskari-Indian-girl!

1. Say NO to short western clothes.

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The first and the foremost rule to enter the school of sanskar is never ever wearing stylish clothes that reveal too much of skin (unless it is a saree!). The skin show in a saree is completely justified. No matter how good you look, how comfortable you feel, NO MEANS NO!

2. Say NO to alcohol and cigarettes.

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Sanskari girls are not allowed to booze or smoke even in dreams. So, just in case, any of your friends ask you out for a beer or so on a weekend, say NO! And don’t just stop there. Simply stop talking to them, stop being with them, and just block them.

3. Asking for freedom = roaming naked!

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Mind your ‘maryaada’! Do not dare to have an opinion of your own. Simply do what you are told to do. No need to use your brain at all. If all the fat aunties in your society want you to get married and have kids because you’re 25, obey them. After all who cares for your shitty degree in Physics or aspirations to fly a plane?

4. You should be able to cook all the dishes existing in this world.

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According to the faculty of school of sanskars, it is, of course, men who run the world. And the way to a man’s heart is, apparently, his stomach. So, how can you NOT cook what he asks for? As mentioned above, that Physics degree is of no use. Learn cooking.

5. Forget having; DO NOT EVEN talk about sex!

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Talking about or desiring sex is a sin for all good girls. Always remember that you have to save your virginity till your wedding night for a strange man who will be chosen by your family. Otherwise, you might be considered similar to a prostitute by those aunties.

6. You should have long hair and clear skin.

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Oh yes! Having short highlighted hair or tattoos on the body is not something a sanskari girl can ever think of. Your long hair and clear skin are the most evident parameters of your sanskar. The longer the hair, the higher the level of sanskars.

7. Stay away from men.

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Forget being friends, do not even look at or talk to men. Good girls do not have male friends. They can only be friends with other sanskari girls. If you do not follow this rule, you might send wrong messages to boys or even invite them to rape you.

8. The only aim you have to achieve in life is of becoming a sanskari bahu.

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If you aspire to become a doctor or an engineer, drop the idea immediately! Becoming a ‘bahu’ must be the only thing you should aspire to. So instead of getting admission in some useless college or university, start learning to cook, clean, wash, laundry, stitch, sing, dance, etc.- for your in-laws!

9. Get back to your home before 5 PM. Always!

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Follow this deadline strictly, especially, when roaming alone. Staying outside your home for long after sunsets is also an invitation to rape. “Akeli ladki; khuli tijori…” Remember??? So always get back to your home early so that those uncles & aunties don’t start judging you.

Now that you have understood the basics of becoming a sanskari girl, just get rid of your phone/ laptop and go straight to the kitchen! Because, that’s the place you belong to. Good luck!

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